JenniferCyrFamilyChildCare

It lays the foundation for learning for the rest of a child’s life.

Building social connections, between both children and the adults who raise them, is critical for future resilience.

A sense of belonging develops, fortifying a sense of self worth and value. When a child feels like a valued member of a community, it fosters a sense of ownership and pride.

Opportunities to find their passions are offered…performances, guest speakers, field trips! They are part of the teaching tools used to reach a variety of learners and reach even the most introverted child.

Kindergarten offers a place for young children to develop crucial social skills like self-awareness, self-regulation, relationship development and problem-solving.

BOTTOM LINE: kindergarten isn’t about abc’s and 123’s. It’s about the child and their ultimate potential.

Children need to be included.

Children need to feel safe and valued.

Children need to have an opportunity to belong.

There are so many things in life that can be scary when you are a small child. Things that are new, big, fast, loud…you get the idea. Part of my job is to help children work through their fears, and while I can’t always predict what might frighten a child, there are some constants among children.

I’m not going to go over a whole list, you already know what they are. Just think for a moment about the why…just for a minute. Sometimes, a child is startled by an unexpected stimulus, has an experience that led to a negative association, and sometimes fear is learned from the child’s environment. By environment, I include their physical surroundings as well as the social surroundings like parents and caregivers.

You may wonder where I’m going with this…it’s simple: be thoughtful about how you respond to “scary things”. My favorite example of this is a thunderstorm…a beautiful natural phenomenon that can be frightening or magical. So here’s the favor: teach your children to love the thunderstorm.

When we were kids, my mom would all call us outside to the porch to watch the rain careen down the street (we lived on a hill). We would wrap up in blankets and sit on the porch floor with our backs against the house. Sometimes, she would make us popcorn to eat while we watched the lightening and listened for the thunder. It was a wonderful routine that still conjures fond memories…I can still hear one of her favorite songs that she’d play after the storm. Check it out here!

It’s only natural that child care providers are going to be caring for the children of parents (guardians, foster parents, grandparents…) whose political and or religious views are drastically different from our own…but it can be delicate. So we need to be thoughtful and intentional about how we approach these relationships.

Looking back, when I was a younger teacher, I didn’t really have strong views yet, so it wasn’t such an issue for me. Now that I’ve lived and learned so much more, I have VERY strong opinions and views. And part of my personal journey has been to be as authentic and true to myself as possible. So how do I reconcile that with the families for which I provide care? (And let’s be real-we often become like family in this small setting and intimate role)

When talking with children: (imagine the topic of heaven for example)

• Always let them guide the conversation
• Ask them what they think
• When they ask general questions, suggest they ask their families. Sometimes kids will ask their friends or look in books for answers…roll with it
• When they ask you what you think, keeping in mind their development, answer simply but honestly. For example, I had a child keep telling me that my friend who passed away was in heaven. I believe something else, so without discounting her family faith, I told her, “I don’t know much about heaven, but I think my friends’ energy is in the wind and the snow and the sunsets.”
• Trust children to be true to their family beliefs and still encourage learning about different views, after all, you want them to be open minded in the larger sense…

When talking to adults that we’re trying to build relationships with: (imagine conservative/liberal political views)

• Keep discussions limited to the child as you get to know each other
• Make sure you only talk appropriately and respectfully if children are present
• Be honest. There’s no need to hide your views. Of course it’s not necessary to shout it from the rooftops, but if someone asks about my Bernie bumper sticker, I’ll share my affinity for his work.
• Be open. This country would be so dull if we all had the same ideals…and even though I might disagree with more conservative ideas, there’s still something I can learn from hearing where the other person is coming from.
• The adults we work with are also still learning and forming their own values. How else will they know what other views there are unless they have the opportunity to talk with people who think differently?
• Remember that it is not our job to convince people of anything other than what is best for their child in a child care and family setting. Our job is to support families as they grow, and while it might be tempting to share our views, opinions, ultimately our role is to support them as they raise a tiny human.

Bottom Line: practice empathy and respect, be who you are with pride and simplicity, and trust your children’s curious minds

Sometimes television catches me by surprise. I enjoy tv and find it to be an effective escape at times. I was watching Grey’s Anatomy this evening and one of the characters sought some advice from an older wiser woman, a mom. She was asking about a teen that she was mentoring, sponsoring, sort of parenting. The woman was struggling with her role for this teen, and the older woman says,

“You’re building a boat…They’re going to sail away from us…it’s inevitable. Our job is to build a boat strong enough that when they decide to, they can get back to us safely.”

The boat is your relationship with your child, or your charge in the case of the character. With a strong relationship to come back to, your child will feel open to new experiences and know the freedom of being their own person.

There’s also a really wonderful children’s book that shows how toddlers look for their independence while looking back to their safety net, their anchor, their mom or whatever. And it reminds us how important it is for our kids to feel safe in order to take risks and try new things!

Check it out here!

In the past, the term “daycare” was widely used to describe a place where young children spend their day while their parents are at work. Children were snuggled and read to and got to play, a nice way to spend the time and for someone to earn a living while caring for their own children as well.

Guess what? Things have changed. Drastically. You can’t just take care of kids in your house anymore. Here’s a small list of some changes, and a little info about them.

• Home owners insurance: if you provide childcare without notifying your insurance company, they could deny future claims.
• The state regulations have increased from 26 pages to a whopping 109 pages: and if you want your home owners insurance to be satisfied, you’d better be registered and in good standing!
• The rules for our state include things like family involvement, emergency response plans, water testing, knowledge of early learning standards and more: you can no longer just watch kids at home without learning lots of new things.
• And so much more, but I don’t want to scare anyone!

So, the terms we use to describe our profession, because that is what it truly is, deserve some thought. This daycare/childcare debate has been ongoing here for a few years, so I reached out to all the early education folks I know and have contact with to hear what they have to say.

Daycare = who’s taking care of the days?

Childcare = Educated, loving, nurturing individual who wakes up every day and says, “what adventure will we have today with the children in our care”, while parents and guardians are working.

Child care shows more respect to us as the Educators as well as respect to the child who is leaning so much every second of the time they are with us

I dont care for the day, I care for the child.

daycare i associate with mediocre teachers and a sub-par experience for children.

I think that over the years “daycares” have been represented in media culture as a drop off place where kids go wild (e.g., Daddy Daycare, etc). This can leave more of a negative connotation on society when they hear “daycare.” The word “child” often has a more positive connotation!

I agree along the lines of some of the other comments; an “early education (care) centre” demands respect for the program itself, the children, and the educators.

First thoughts … daycare sounds more Americanised and childcare more English … probably due to American films often referring to daycare.

I’m in the UK, Daycare where I am is for older people, in terms of children I think of American home daycare.

Child care could be private nursery, local authority centres or childminding to me.

I say I work in ‘Early Years’. To me Childcare puts child first therefore the child is most important. Daycare puts day first……

Daycare to me indicates a full day of care. Childcare a much preferred term would be caring for children in general.

I don’t differentiate but perhaps childcare suggests to me an individual looking after children perhaps in their home whereas daycare suggests a more formal nursery style establishment.

Being a parent is so hard, but when your toddler often hits other children, it can be embarrassing, uncomfortable, and just plain upsetting. So I have a few tips for you parents and providers out there because I’ve been there. My son used to bite other children, and his acting out felt like a humiliation, especially given my field of expertise.

• When a child hurts someone, do not assume their intent was to harm. Most often, the intent of the toddler is to connect or engage in some way.
• Before an encounter with other children, make sure your child is rested, fed, and feeling ready. This will make self-regulating so much easier for your child (thinking good mood=better behavior helps)
• Narrate for your toddler. They are still learning how to recognize and interpret social cues. So when Johnny tries to take a book from Susie, you can say, “Susie, I think Johnny likes that book too, he wants to see the pictures.” Sometimes I feel like I am constantly narrating for the toddlers, but it really helps cut down their frustration, and it helps them recognize social cues as well.
• Practice. Practice. Practice. It might seems exhausting, but putting your child in social settings is the best way to get through this difficult phase when it seems like they have become what you perceive to be “the play date terror”. As parents, it is easy to feel like your child is acting terribly, and to feel bad about it, but practice is good for you too. There will be plenty of times when you will have to navigate these kinds of peer difficulties, so start forming this relationships now, and practice talking it out with others.
• When your child is part of a positive and collaborative moment, recognize and acknowledge it. They need us to send a clear message that the way they acted was helpful, positive, desirable. Reinforce the patterns that help build a socially capable human being early.
• And please be gentle and kind to yourself and your parental peers, no matter what side of the situation you are on. It is tough to see your little one get hit, but it’s also tough to be the mom of that child who hit someone. Try some understanding for the child and the adult, and patience. We are all learning.
• And if another parent says something that feels unwelcome or unkind, try not to let it get to you. I know, that’s crazy, right? But a snide comment and a casual observation can easily be confused when we are feeling stressed, embarrassed and judged. Say to yourself, “if it was just an ordinary day without the hitting, would that comment still bother me?” Chances are it wouldn’t. But in the event that there are truly negative feelings, it’s ok to talk about it with that person. Find a quiet moment without children around, and let that person know how you’re feeling.

I hope this helps, and keep in mind, when you feel like you just can’t take it anymore, your child’s behavior pattern will change. They are constantly learning and growing!